[x]
All Deviations
  • 12 Deviations
  • 32 Deviation Comments
  • 43 Deviant Comments
  • 1 Forum Post
  • 3,013 Pageviews

I'm still alive

Journal Entry: Thu Feb 20, 2003, 2:36 PM
Been working on a few projects.. and also working on sleeping a lot.. which explains my inactivity. I'll try and up some stuff this weekend. I think I need Adderal or Ritalin.. I have no initiative or motivation and I can't concentrate on anything for sustained periods of time. I use to be able to program complex things all night long but the last year or two all my concentration has been sucked out of the back of my head with a vacuum. I think one of these days I'll just sit down and go through this whole goddamn C++ Book that's been staring at me for the past 6 months. I mean it's ridiculous.. I don't even have enough concentration to play video games anymore.. it has to be like a really badass game for me to sit down and play it. For instance.. every ID software game.. usually I sort of wander around my room.. fiddle with linux and download mp3s.. then I read for a while.. rearrange my desktop and go to sleep. I also haven't been getting ANY FUCKING sleep lately it sucks. If I start to think about sleep I get tired and I'll fall asleep where I'm sitting. I have to fight to get out of bed in the morning it sucks. I don't know why I'm typing all of this.. it's not like anyone reads it or anything.. I guess it's like self therapy. Hey anyone around here into the Digital Hardcore scene at all? I can't get enough of that shit.. go check out the new digital hardcore compilation it's great. [link]

Devious Information

  • Current Age: 18
  • Current Residence: middle of nowhere
  • Interests: Hallucinogens, Counter culture
  • Favourite movie: 12 monkeys, Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas
  • Favourite band or musician: The Shizit, Prodigy, Myself
  • Favourite genre of music: Experimental, Digital Hardcore, Dn'B
  • Favourite artist: Fuck art let's kill
  • Favourite poet or writer: poetry annoys me.. i read a lot..
  • Favourite photographer: Jane Goodall. Silly monkeys.
  • Operating System: winXP..mandrake 8.1
  • MP3 player of choice: winamp3
  • Shell of choice: Bash
  • Wallpaper of choice: whatever i'm currently using
  • Skin of choice: A freshly skinned prostitute. hahaha
  • Personal Quote: I wish i could cut and paste a profound and deep quote here, but I don't feel like it.

deviantART Notice

[x]

Devious Comments

~Flamsmark:iconFlamsmark: Oct 2, 2004, 7:01:59 PM
need more stereotypes

--
copyright © 2005 Flamsmsmark

dream as if you'll live forever; live as if you'll die today
~darby-crash:icondarby-crash: Jul 24, 2003, 7:42:02 PM
just plain hillarious.... your the bestest
$spyed:iconspyed: Apr 10, 2003, 3:14:21 AM
Have you ever had a dream, that you were so sure was real? What if you were unable to wake from that dream? How would you know the difference between the dream world and the real world?

What you know you can't explain, but you feel it. You've felt it your entire deviant life, that there's something wrong with the story. You don't know what it is, but it's there, like a splinter in your mind, driving you mad.

You take the blue pill, the story ends. Your browser closes and you believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill, you stay in wonderland. And, I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes.

I offer only the truth, nothing more.

Take: The Red Pill
Take: The Blue Pill

Fella Point Right spyed, nobody has ever done this before.
Ninja Point Right I know. That's why it's going to work.

Do not try and bend the spoon ...

--
comment, because you care.
share your love and not your hate.
love the artist, before yourself.
meditate on this.
:ninja: :meditate: :ninja:

Random Deviant
!thevessel:iconthevessel: Feb 28, 2003, 9:07:45 PM
RESIST AUTHORITY by paying for it at the mall. WE'RE ALL DIFFERENT because we're all the same. THINK FOR YOURSELF, we don't.
How much of an individual is someone who doesn't exist without the clothes he or she wears?
I was asked today, "Are you a goth?" Why would anyone who so apparently despises classification climb into that box? Let me narrow my mind so it's easier for you to understand.
Goth, Punk, Sk8ter, what the fuck ever... The more devided we are into these little groups the harder it is for us to see our real enemy. If you choose to climb into a box and classify yourself as something than you might as well realize that you've bought into a stereotype and you CHOSE to be part of it.
We7wire may not be expressing this fluidly or eliquently, but he is expressing a very valid truth. You are so outraged, but why? Because it's part of your stereotype to be outraged. Goths are "fighting against stereotypes," they "try so hard to not be classified." Right. Just because one group of clones doesn't look like another group of clones doesn't mean that both groups aren't clones.
If you're a goth, why don't you analyze the music you listen to. Compare it to the music of Prepies. Compare your clothing, compare your lifestyle. Look at yourself in reverse. Look at yourself in reverse, looking at yourself in a mirror. You are manufactured and mass produced. You are what you hate.
To be a bigot one would have to hate because of race, or gender, or sexual orientation, or some other factor of such a nature. Hypocracy doesn't quality.

Still comrade, calm persuasion is better than a direct attack. What's done is done, but as the perspectives for becoming part of the independant media grow brighter it might be wise to remember the goal is not to distroy those who are still plugged in, but the machine which they are plugged in to. Though your statements may be completely accurate, those who have not felt the wire don't understand there is a decision. It is not their fault, no matter how fun it may be to blame them.
!thevessel:iconthevessel: Feb 28, 2003, 9:06:10 PM
RESIST AUTHORITY by paying for it at the mall. WE'RE ALL DIFFERENT because we're all the same. THINK FOR YOURSELF, we don't.
How much of an individual is someone who doesn't exist without the clothes he or she wears?
I was asked today, "Are you a goth?" Why would anyone who so apparently despises classification climb into that box? Let me narrow my mind so it's easier for you to understand.
Goth, Punk, Sk8ter, what the fuck ever... The more devided we are into these little groups the harder it is for us to see our real enemy. If you choose to climb into a box and classify yourself as something than you might as well realize that you've bought into a stereotype and you CHOSE to be part of it.
We7wire may not be expressing this fluidly or eliquently, but he is expressing a very valid truth. You are so outraged, but why? Because it's part of your stereotype to be outraged. Goths are "fighting against stereotypes," they "try so hard to not be classified." Right. Just because one group of clones doesn't look like another group of clones doesn't mean that both groups aren't clones.
If you're a goth, why don't you analyze the music you listen to. Compare it to the music of Prepies. Compare your clothing, compare your lifestyle. Look at yourself in reverse. Look at yourself in reverse, looking at yourself in a mirror. You are manufactured and mass produced. You are what you hate.
To be a bigot one would have to hate because of race, or gender, or sexual orientation, or some other factor of such a nature. Hypocracy doesn't quality.

Still comrade, calm persuasion is better than a direct attack. What's done is done, but as the perspectives for becoming part of the independant media grow brighter it might be wise to remember the goal is not to distroy those who are still plugged in, but the machine which they are plugged in to. Though your statements may be completely accurate, those who have not felt the wire don't understand there is a decision. It is not their fault, no matter how fun it may be to blame them.
~-hitori:icon-hitori: Feb 10, 2003, 7:39:33 AM
Hey my friend, don't listen to these uppity yanks with theri maturist' egotistical bullshit, carry on submitting..How can your Art be offending. Surely they must realise you're having a laugh :) (Smile)

Great work, keep it up.
~deadbydawn66:icondeadbydawn66: Jan 31, 2003, 10:12:05 PM
hehe, wow, i can see that you are quite a controversee here=P (Razz) well i cant tell if you like me or not or if that last comment was mean or not, but i guess untill i kno i like you...hehe...although that comment about my"blowjob lips"was quite disturbing hehe. it made me laugh aloud though. i thinki needed a laugh that day...;) (Wink)
~darkchemist:icondarkchemist: Jan 30, 2003, 8:54:31 PM
i agree with ~theuglymimecynicandr. That was an inappropriate, and immature thing to say. people work really hard on some things and dont deserver to have coments like that. im sorry for bitching, but i thaught something had to be said.


--
:skullbones:DARKCHEMIST:skullbones:
My Stock Account [link]
~theuglymimecynicandr:icontheuglymimecynicandr: Jan 29, 2003, 9:46:31 PM
wow.....your starting a whole contreversy in your comment section aren;t you hahahaaa.....

mewm...sir..I like you simply becaus I don't know you....but...hahahaa..I didn;t like your comment..for deadbydawn..it was just rude..sorry...

--
mew!
Feel the power of rushing waters...remorsefully surronding your locks of heart.
:iconamanterservus57:this is beauty...

:iconj00-stock: this is my stock....-_-
~gemini523:icongemini523: Jan 28, 2003, 3:12:37 PM
you seem to try to cut away from pop culture without realising you are part of it , even if its the part thats against it ...

--
:]
~ingrave:iconingrave: Jan 28, 2003, 1:27:17 PM
this guy is very right about everything he sed about "teenagers"....

so stop bitching...
~jebus:iconjebus: Jan 22, 2003, 11:32:23 PM
your cool, I see what your getting at and i dig it. honestly, keep up the good work.

--
Better then that time some guy made some comments about your mom's fondness of sailors.
*cursed-soul:iconcursed-soul: Jan 17, 2003, 11:55:59 AM
youre... different lol.

nehh dont do druggs, why?
dont know.
~we7wire:iconwe7wire: Jan 17, 2003, 9:49:12 AM
I'm sorry i'm not eloquent enough, I'll start writing sappy poetry to get my point across. Yes I can see how making paintbrush drawings and uploading them on the internet is incredibly similar to mass mind/market control. I must be a corporate slave as well. Incredibly astute observation. And what THE FUCK does maturity have to do with anything? I think it was einstein that said maturity is a collection of prejudices learned by age 18. Fuck you and your maturity bullshit I'll wallow in my childishness thank you very much. And yes I produce art that's meant to offend.. if something offends you, then I think that I've been successful. Harmless art doesn't change anything, and that's what I'm all about is attempting to change things.. no matter how big or small. I'll try and make some neat 3d circles or some poems about kittens and flowers in the future.. something you can appreciate and praise as original and creative. And yes Mr. Nitrus I enjoy the security of virtual reality, I can express opinions freely and get a load of feedback. In real life unique or controversial opinions are suppressed with violence and hatred. I have expressed my opinions and public and people's responses are usually amusing and predictable to say the least. And if I'm a little boy I'm actually fairly good size.. and your right I don't comb my hair that much it's kind of a mess, I should probably call my mom and have her come over and comb it for me. And what the FUCK is this shit behind my ears? It appears there every morning.. smells like broccoli
`myheadphones:iconmyheadphones: Jan 17, 2003, 1:16:31 AM
do you like monkeys?
i have a friend with a really cool monkey

he bought it at the mall
~nitrus:iconnitrus: Jan 17, 2003, 1:16:30 AM
Do you enjoy hiding behind the security of virtual reality? I am sure that you wouldn't voice what you have here in real life. I would have to say you are a scared little boy sitting in front of his computer wondering if your mommy combed your hair correctly this morning and cleaned behind your ears.

--
empty.
~raven777:iconraven777: Jan 16, 2003, 10:51:13 PM
OK, I think we are all bored now...
Its been real....
Last Post
RaVen

--
:iconbelletrist: :iconzzaga: :iconmyra911:
:iconflexoutlaw: :iconbonbon: :iconfangedfem:
:iconjackdirt: :iconjonywedge: :iconbeccus:


Annikka von Holdt. for sparing what time you
have learned so much from you...That one day
*worldhurricane:iconworldhurricane: Jan 16, 2003, 9:14:47 PM
no, really. why do you bother?

you despise consumer culture so much, yet you're right in the midst of it, and even keep tallies of your pageviews like some marketing agent. only you aren't out to please people, you're out to piss them off; similar to all those goth children you so loathe. they try to run counter to the status quo. yet in so doing, they become their own target market.

similarly, you try (or claim to, from what i've seen so far) to reject the ideas of corporate culture and marketing. yet the ways you've choosen to use to achieve that goal are the same techniques used by marketing reps. the key difference being: they seek to please, you seek to offend.

you have some good ideas (fundamentally), but you unfortunately aren't mature enough to express those in an eloquent or engaging way.

again, i encourage you to create the best work that you can. however, if all you are capable of producing are insults, then please, leave this community and go to another site where that sort of behavior is encouraged.

--
:katana: Reason always loses to panic and propagandha. :jarksaber:
~we7wire:iconwe7wire: Jan 16, 2003, 8:57:36 PM
Oh yeah.. and my insults weren't directed at raven 5000 or whatever her/his name was I was talking about the shitty poems that chesterfield guy writes. And I understand crystal clear what "goth" is all about. All I have to do is walk down the hallways of a local high school or go to a few concerts and that's all I need to know. A bunch of kids dressing up scary and trying to fit in. And don't tell me your unique or different.. if there's millions of you across the united states that look exactly like you, listen to the same music as you, and think nearly the same thoughts as you, then you are not different or unique. Your doing exactly what "jocks" or "Skateboarders" or "punks" or what have you do.. which is fitting in. Your not outcasts, your not special, your just generic. And the whole reason I started flaming you people is because after reading all the comments on chesterfields "poetry" I couldn't contain my disgust. It's extremely weak material at best, desperately grasping for attention by trying to be scary or "disturbing". Plus that and the comments were fucking ridiculous.."ooooh it's so beautiful.. the word play" make me sick.. anyways.. after i finish a few more of my stereotype paintbrush drawings I can expect a whole new crowd of pissed off kids.. this is fun
~we7wire:iconwe7wire: Jan 16, 2003, 8:13:49 PM
HA HA HA HA. That's the cheesiest thing i've ever heard. You people really just crawl out of the woodwork don't you? Oh well like I've said before, your a dime a dozen. Your attempt at "fancy talkin'" was appreciated though, made me laugh out loud. Thou canst go fuckest thyself.. and what you said made no sense at all.. maybe your white makeup and crappy goth rock is affecting your brain in some manner..
~wrexodus:iconwrexodus: Jan 16, 2003, 7:44:55 PM
Thou art nothing less but of an adolescent disgrace. Isn't it that difficult just to be in commitment of tolerating goths? They are beings in which they beckon with both death and god, and what you are doing to them right now is misunderstanding their beckoning and instead, ravaging them with very priceless child-like remarks.

For example, do i just go raving the streets that is chock-full of ordinary people and write a tattoo that says "you're a poof"? Fuck no! But you on the other hand, don't even bother to take considerate measures and scream out "FUCK YEAH!!".

Now that is the most apathetic motives i've ever heard, seen, nor even tasted. It and you yourself does not serve well in benefits of acceptance in this fragile, yet widely versatile community. Therefore i'm giving you your last chance to leave the community without any harm. Resorting to firefights will do you worse. I can assure you how painful it will be to incur the wrath of the goths. Mark my words.

Mark my words....
~we7wire:iconwe7wire: Jan 16, 2003, 6:02:22 PM
yes, people who despise mediocrity start wars.. I can see the logic you used to come to that conclusion. *dripping sarcasm* Actually it's business men and corporations that control the ebb and flow of currency around the globe that start wars. Politics=Business. War=Money. Zombies (like you)=Cannon Fodder. It's also the same businessmen who design and market the trends you so eagerly buy into. If you don't believe me read the interview with Howard Bloom in the disinfo book "You are being lied to", he talks about how in the '80's he pretty much invented glam metal and heavy metal magazines after careful study and demographics. That is just one example (and it worked brilliantly).. if you really dig into it.. modern culture is a cheap synthetic product pushed onto us by businessmen who rely on statistics and numbers to figure out what we "like". Anyways.. rambling on again.. I don't need to tell you what to think.. come to your own conclusions if your capable
`myheadphones:iconmyheadphones: Jan 16, 2003, 11:28:02 AM
where did you get all your clothes?
did you find them?
if so.. where are you scavaging
i could save tons of money that way!
`myheadphones:iconmyheadphones: Jan 16, 2003, 11:21:50 AM
you need to hug your mother more :( (Sad)
`bonbon:iconbonbon: Jan 16, 2003, 10:36:35 AM
oh i got quoted in your journal... now i really feel special.
again, you are so wrong.... but then what you are doing is giving your opinion which is covered under the Freedom of Speech Atc. What is not covered under that act is the ability to attack a person, an individual for their opinion. All you have done is create a mess. Certainly, you find yourself in the spotlight and I am sure that you are thouroughly enjoying the attention. Personally, I find you to be a bigot of the worst kind. It's people like you who start wars and cause such horrifying acts to be committed such as the Holocaust. I would like to suggest that you read this book to get a better understanding of human behavior, "On Becoming a Person" by Carl R. Rogers. Then get back to me about being a part of the corporate demagogary.


--
Beware, I bite

find me: [link]